I felt like ranting today. (I had three hours free today at uni... And I didn't have any decent drawing programs, or even access to a scanner, to post up new art. So I thought I'd just pass the time by ranting instead.)
Okay, there are many things that piss me off in Newgrounds, but I'm only going to go into a few of them here...
Firstly, how many people are going to post two-dimensional, choppy, badly drawn stickman animations? They're not original, they're not entertaining, and they're most definitely NOT talented. What pisses me off most about them is that they're all the EXACT SAME! They all go something like this:
Stickman A and B are in a fistfight.
Stickman A will either throw a fireball, pull out a gun, or shoot a laser out of his anus.
Stickman A and B will exchange fire for a moment. They will probably start to fly/hover.
One stickman kills the other, or the animation cuts out because the animator got bored/impatient about posting his "work" up on NG.
I realise now that many animators use stickmen so that nobody sees the simple fact that the animator cannot draw. I mean - drawing basic characters is not difficult, but these 'animators' seem totally incapable of doing even that. They are also incapable of making the animation run at a decent framerate, because the animation is so choppy, it borders on epilepsy-fuel.
For the love of god, people, STOP POSTING THESE THINGS.
Second, is these 'animations' where something happens, blah blah blah, and then we fall into a continuous animation loop with terrible music in the background... What annoys me even more is that these annoying epilepsy-inducing loops still seem to get good reviews and scores. What the hell gives? Are people so braindead nowadays that looking at a wheel going round and round would amuse them?
Another one is one that many people will agree with me on...
Why is it that when someone of low intelligence walks into the art forum, they NEVER read the rules? Surely the itellectually-challenged among us are the ones who most need to read the rules?
But no, they just come in and spam the same picture over and over, make repeated, angry requests for 'sigs', steal the art of other artists and claim it as their own, post repeated, badly drawn Microsoft Paint pictures that took them less than five minutes to draw (using the age-old excuse of "It's not bad for paint, is it?" Believe it or not, people can do very good drawings with MS paint when they take their time on it.... The reason your artwork stinks is because you spent FIVE MINUTES on it.)
I designed a christmas card that I intended to send to everyone who comits these crimes against intelligence... But when I realised that it only comprised of two words ryhming with 'luck shoe', I scrapped my plan.
The next "pet peeve" of mine is that I really can't stand these people who just say "Your art is good." To absolutely everybody. They are the ultimate sycophants. I know that most people probably don't notice this, but since I started frequenting this site, I have noticed that these people never give any constructive criticism, and never seem to be able to point out anything that is genuinely bad art. They aren't helping anyone.
Yet equally infuriating is the other extreme... Those people who only come into the Art Forum to say a nonconstructive criticism such as "bad"... Probably in an effort to increase their forum-post count.
I think this is the last topic I'm going to tackle, now... Abstract art.
Abstract art is fine by me, it really is. But the stuff that I see 'artists' calling 'abstract art' on NG is very rarely abstract art. It's a shameful attempt to cover up their own inability at art.
Because they are incapable of drawing even a stickman, they feel the need to draw a series of badly-drawn squares and coloured circles in MS paint, and then call it 'abstract' so that people cannot just come out and say that (for example) "Your human anatomy's way off." Or "Bumblebees have six legs." Or anything like that. The realm of 'abstract' provides safe haven for bad artists, and there are those who think that abstract art is the emperor's new clothes.
The emperor's new clothes is an old (and allegedly true) folk tale. I can't remember much about it, other than the fact that it was about a travelling salesman who sold an empty coathanger (or whatever they used before coathangers were invented in the 1800s.) to a dim-witted Emperor saying that it was a magical robe of wonderful design. A design so complex and magical that if a fool looked upon the robes, they would appear to be invisible.
Naturally, the Emperor didn't see anything other than the empty coathanger, so he thought "oh dear, I must be a fool." But he didn't confess that he couldn't see the robes. Instead, he bought them for a ridiculous fee, then proceeded to wear the "robes" when he went into parliament the next day. After he explained that his clothes were invisible to fools, nobody said a word.
When the Emperor next made a public speaking, everyone laughed, because the Emperor had appeared before his people naked, and so the Emperor, humiliated and angry, retreated back to his palace.
I can't remember where the story goes from there, but all the relevant details to abstract art are there all the same. When someone posts up abstract art, people feel "Oh, I can't say anything bad about it it... It's abstract. Abstract art is supposed to be that way."
Really, people. Grow a backbone and start asking questions about the art. Ask them what the symbolism of a particular circle is, or a particular line. If they cannot do it, then that part of the art has no artistic meaning.Thus, it is not good abstract art.
Now, for some things that I DO like about NG.
I really enjoy well-drawn stickman animations.
I know this seems contradictory to my earlier statements about stickmen, so bear with me. I suppose it's a bit like a pint of beer.
Anyone can stick a glass under a beer tap, pull the lever and fill the glass, but when someone inexperienced does it, they almost always get more froth than beer, and the pint is ruined. However, an experienced and skilful barman can pour a glass of beer without getting any froth at all.
Perhaps that needs a little explaining. Basically, I'm trying to illustrate that an experienced animator can make a stickman move in such a smooth, elegant, beautiful manner. They can even make them look so emotive and even three-dimensional by the virtue of their movement and pose. My favourite example of this is the fourth episode in the "sleeping warrior" series. It's in my favourites, if you want to see it.
I have great respect for the art forum's Mods, because they actually DO give praise where it is due, and criticism where necessary. So my hat's off to the NG Art mod's team for their level-headed reviews of other's art.
I enjoy looking at the art of other artists, particularly those whose talent surpasses my own. (Because it provides an encouragement and inspiration to me, as well as the fact that I can learn a lot from studying their techniques and styles.)
The Newgrounds Art forum is also a very rewarding environment to learn in as an artist. You can help others to achieve their potential and in turn, other artists can help you to reach yours.
But the best one of all is the excited feeling you get when you post up a new topic containing your most recent, lovingly-done piece of art, and then come back a few minutes later to see that you have your first reply in the topic.
Although I have written more for my dislikes, that's only because I am a naturally hateful person. I actually do really enjoy being here, and I log on at least once a day to read posts in the forum and watch some flash animations.
I like pudding.
- Kenneth Gardner.
viceman
could you descibe it with one word or less
Ynek
Pudding.